Ponch's
by Melissa Kutcher
Summary: A CHiPs-Pee-wee's Playhouse crossover, the CHiPs cast visits the playhouse


Ponch's Playhouse (a spoof of Pee-Wee's Playhouse) by Melissa Kutcher 

All Pee-Wee's Playhouse characters copyright Paul Reubens 1986-91. 

"Hello boys and girls! It's your friend Ponch! Let's find out today's Secret Word!" he yelled. 

Ponch unplugged Conky to find out the secret word. 

"Conky 2000 ready to assist you, Ponch," the robot replied. 

"What's today's palabra secreta?" Ponch asked. 

Conky spits out a little piece of paper with a word on it. 

"Today's secret word is 'dance'. Everybody knows what to do when anybody says the secret word?" Ponch asked. 

"SCREAM!!" everybody in the Playhouse yelled. 

"That's right. For the rest of the day, if anyone says the secret word, scream real loud. Let's try the word out," Ponch said happily. "Hey, Magic Screen, what do you like to do when you listen to music?" 

"Well, Ponch, I like to dance," Magic Screen answered. 

"Aaaah!" everyone screamed. 

"How do you say the secret word in Spanish?" Pterri asked. 

"Bailar," Ponch yelled. 

"Aaaah!" everyone screamed. 

"Announcing the most beautiful woman in Puppetland," Mr. Window stated. 

"Yeah, Miss Bonnie!" Ponch yelled as he was straightening his gray suit and red bow tie. 

"Hello Ponch! Hello boys and girls!" Miss Bonnie cheerfully said. 

"You look as beautiful as you usually do, Miss Bonnie," Ponch said. 

"It's such a beautiful day, it makes me want to dance," Miss Bonnie said as she fluffed her bouffant, which was the size of Alaska. 

"Aaaah!" everyone screamed. 

"I just love saying the secret word, Ponch," Miss Bonnie said with a twinkling smile. "A smile is the most important accessory everybody can wear." 

"Look at me, Miss Bonnie, I'm smiling," Chairry said. 

"You look beautiful, Chairry," Miss Bonnie smiled. 

Just then, the Picture Phone started ringing. 

"I'll get it!" Ponch yelled, running to the Picture Phone. 

Once he got inside the Picture Phone, Ponch put on a pirate's hat. 

"Ponch's Playhouse, Ponch speaking," he said enthusiastically. 

"Howdy, Ponch, it's Cowboy Jon!" 

"Cowboy Jon, cool!" Ponch exclaimed. 

"Would you like to play on my ranch?" Cowboy Jon asked. 

"Sure! Would you let me play on your horse?" Ponch asked. 

"Old Grey is looking forward to a ride," Cowboy Jon said. 

"I'm ready to go!" Ponch yelled. 

### 

When Cowboy Jon and Ponch returned from playing, Sindy the Mail-lady was waiting. 

"You've got mail from your pen pals, Ponch," Sindy said, pulling a big bag. 

"Ohh, here's a letter from Iowa!" Ponch said gleefully. 

He then opened the letter. 

"Dear Ponch, My name is Melissa. I live in Iowa." 

"It's over here," Globey said, pointing at the Mississippi River where it goes from east to west. 

"In Iowa, we have pigs. We also grow corn. Hope to see you soon. Bye. Your pal, Melissa." 

"Let's have a party. I could teach you how to dance!" Ponch yelled. 

"Aaaah!" everyone screamed. 

### 

Everybody was at the Playhouse for the big party. The Playhouse Gang, and all the others, were enjoying themselves. 

"Would you teach a new dance?" Bruce asked. 

"Aaaah!" everyone screamed. 

Ponch taught everyone the Hustle, while Cowboy Jon taught everyone the Texas Two-Step. 

"I wish that all my pen pals could come to the Playhouse!" Ponch cried. 

"Wish! Did someone say wish?" Grossie the Genie asked. 

"I wish that all my pen pals could be at the Playhouse right now," Ponch said enthusiastically. 

"Okay, repeat after me, in Grossieze. Meckalecka-hi, Meckalecka-Grossie-ho," Grossie said. 

Ponch did as the Genie said. 

"Your wish is granted. Long live Grossie." 

All of a sudden, eight women and two men magically appear. 

"Ponch's Playhouse in person!" a woman wearing a Chicago Bulls baseball cap said. 

"What's your name?" Ponch asked. 

"My name is Melissa. Over by Cowboy Jon is Marcia, and the woman skipping with Bear is Mady," Melissa replied. 

Julie was giving a turtle to the Playhouse, while Ed was getting a massage from Chairry. Keith was singing with Miss Bonnie, and Amy was talking with Jeb. Alexandra and Bruce were playing jacks, while Tangee and Pterri were reading stories. 

"Okay, everybody! I'd like to teach you a new dance," Melissa announced. 

"Aaaah!" everyone screamed. 

"I just love that secret word. First you tap your thumbs to your index and middle fingers, then put your fists in front of your shoulders and flap them. Then you squat while you are flapping your arms. Next, you clap your hands five times. Finally you hold hands with the people next to you and run around in a circle," Melissa told everyone. 

"What is this dance called, Melissa?" Sindy asked. 

"It's called the Chicken Dance," Melissa replied. 

"Aaaah!" everyone screamed. 

"Snack time!" Ponch yelled. 

"Yippee!" everybody yelled in unison. 

"Today's snack is Ding Dongs! Everybody dig in!" Ponch yelled. 

The party continued with everybody having a good time. 

### 

Ponch's alarm clock went off. He awoke to see his son, Frank Jr., smiling while holding a breakfast tray. 

"Daddy, it's almost time for our favorite show," Frank Jr. exclaimed. 

"It sure is," Ponch said, hugging his son. 

"is it all right if I go to Uncle Jon and Aunt Sandy's after school?" Frank Jr. asked. 

"Yes, you can," Ponch answered. 

Pee-Wee's Playhouse is coming on. Would you like to go there someday?" Frank Jr. asked. 

"In my dreams," Ponch answered his son. 

Ponch and Frank Jr. enjoyed their favorite show. 


End file.
